Fast forward to now, last week I went to the eye doctor to get my eyes checked because I felt it was necessary to update my prescription. There were four awkward moments that led me to make that appointment. Here they are...

Finding my future husband at a bar. I bumped into him at a dark, crowded bar. It was love at first (blurry) sight. We exchanged numbers, but my friends quickly dragged me away. The next weekend, mystery man and I met again, but the lights were on this time. He was about a foot shorter than me, had greasier hair than Danny Zuco, and probably had a fake ID. Sigh. He wasn't my future anything. The worst part is I was designated driver the night we met, so beer goggles weren't an excuse.
Getting concussed while working out. I like to read magazines while I'm treading along on the elliptical. It makes time go by a lot faster. I was having trouble reading the juicy articles in Cosmopolitan, so I leaned in closer. I probably looked like Quasimodo trying to get his fitness on with how hunched over I was. I still couldn't see clearly, so I leaned in a little closer. I lost my footing and wapped my head on the machine. A very smooth move in front of all the muscly hunks.
Cheering for the wrong team. It was the first football game of the season. We were all at a crowded bar rooting on our Sun Devils. Everyone was pretty into it and there was maybe one fan for the opposing team. When we scored, I screamed for the touchdown, clapping my hands, and throwing my hand up for a high five. That one opposing fan enthusiastically slapped his hand against mine. His team had scored, not ours. Whoops! That's what I get for pretending I understand football.
Thank goodness I have my new prescription. Now I won't be known as a dognapper, I can use beer goggles as an excuse next time, I won't need a helmut for cardio, and I won't be forked by my fellow Sun Devils.
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